2018 goals

January 9, 2018


Just check the archives of this website and you’ll see that I’ve always been a sucker for goal-setting. However, I definitely have the tendency to measure my worth on how productive I am, which is one of the big lies I’ve had to face over the past couple of years. I would set goals to check items off a list, no matter if they really had any meaning for me or not.

After a couple years of survival mode and burnout, I’m finally setting goals again. This time, I’ve done a LOT of introspection about what matters most to me, and these goals are all pointed in that direction. I’m also using Powersheets for the first time, which have helped a lot to guide me.

I decided to set eight broad goals for the year, each for a different area of life. Most of them are not specific, but are aimed at celebrating progress over perfection. I will also be creating monthly and weekly goals (which will be specific) as well as daily habits I want to cultivate.

Eight may seem like a lot, and it kind of is! So I’ve decided that the first three are my top priorities. If I ever have to decide what to focus on based on time, money, or energy limitations, anything that brings me closer to those three will win out.

So here they are:

1: Come into full communion with the Catholic Church with joy and incorporate it into my whole life.

Even though this has been a big area of focus for me through the past year, I am keeping it at #1 priority because my faith is my anchor. This will be the year that I fully enter the church, which is a huge deal, so I want to embrace that.

2: Foster serenity by intentionally resting and rediscovering what brings me joy.

It’s taken me a long time to realize that I need a lot of sleep, alone time, and white space in my life to function optimally. I have been so quick to drop any hobbies that I enjoy in favor of productivity (and what I call “doing what I need to do to keep myself and the kids alive”), and while that may have been necessary for awhile, I want to be excited about them again. I did read a lot last year, but I want to be better about reading the things I want to read, not just reading for book clubs or what everyone else is reading. I also want to be better about abandoning books that aren’t right for me at the time. Anyway, self-care through rest and recreation is my second priority so that I can have the energy to pour into others (and also, it usually drops to the bottom of the list so I need to remind myself it is important.)

3: Love David well.

I want a better marriage; I want David to be sober and happy and home and involved. Unfortunately I have learned the hard way that I have no control over that. (I mean, if only he would just do what I tell him to do….) But the one thing I can control in our marriage is myself. Change yourself, and you change the relationship. I can love him well, and sometimes that looks like sending him love notes and going on dates, but other times it’s hard. It’s examining my own shortcomings that lead to codependency. It’s setting boundaries.

4: Grow as a present, patient, and nurturing parent.

Now we get into the rest of life. I am full-on single parenting right now, and I can see it as a burden or an opportunity. My kids are actually pretty adorable and fun most of the time and I want to enjoy their company. I never expect to be a perfect mother but I can definitely grow.

5: Lower my cholesterol to normal, and get physically stronger through exercise.

I thought long and hard about what I wanted my health goal to be, and I landed on this because what really matters to me is to feel energized and to be healthy in the long run. I really have no idea why my cholesterol is high, but I know I can most likely get it down with some changes in diet.

6: Build a tribe of local friends to pour into and accept support from.

I have spent much of the past year isolated and lonely. Now more than ever I need a community of support, and since it feels good to focus on other people rather than my own problems, I want to give back. I am not someone who needs a wide array of friends, but I do well with a select few that are very deep. I would like to take the initiative more on reaching out to friends who I click with, but for whatever reason don’t see much.

7: Cultivate a life-giving home through the domestic church, routines, simplification, and decor.

Our home is my happy place. I love being there and everything about it is meaningful to me. This is always a fun one for me to work on.

8: Pay off two debts, and save at least $1000 for emergencies.

We have been doing the debt snowball method for over a year now, and it is working. Even though we still have significant debt, with diligence it can all be paid off in three years or sooner if we focus. I’m excited to see real progress this year.

January goals

If you’ve read this far, way to go! I thought about breaking this into another post for January goals, but then it would probably never get done. So I’m going to keep going and hope you can handle it. ;)

Here is where I get specific, and this is what I’ve got planned for January:


  • Memorize the Chaplet of Divine Mercy: a meditative prayer for healing that I love. If I have it memorized I can pray it more easily and often. (Goal 1)
  • Read the Al-Anon big book: It’s been a long time since I’ve read recovery literature in depth. Now is the perfect time. (Goal 3)
  • Do a house refresh: Put away the Christmas decorations and do some deeper cleaning. (Goal 7)
  • No personal spending, and less than $100 on groceries. (Goal 8)


  • Read a book (Goal 2)
  • Write David a love note (Goal 3)
  • Make plans with a friend (Goal 6)


  • Read the Bible: I’m still in the middle of a reading plan. (Goal 1)
  • 7-minute workout: I’m aiming for 5x per week or 22x this month. (Goal 5)
  • 10,000 steps (Goal 5)
  • Kids hygiene: I need to be more diligent about making sure the kids take frequent showers and brush their teeth. This is embarrassing but real! (Goal 4)

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Posted in: personal, goals

around here

January 2, 2018

I’m typing this alone in a hotel room and it is pure bliss. Even though my kids were sobbing when I left and I kind of love how close we’ve become through the past months, there comes a point when this introvert mama needs a break and I’m near giddy with excitement over being here. For the next two days I will be attending an intensive family program at the rehab center where David is. I decided to get a hotel because it is over an hour away and I didn’t feel like driving that during rush hour, not to mention the fact that it is going to be sleeting overnight. Okay, and the prospect of the hotel room to…
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Posted in: personal, around here

have courage, dear heart

December 30, 2017

My word for 2018 is Courage. Originally, it was going to be Serenity. I was tired of being in survival mode, feeling chaotic, stressed out about my circumstances. I wanted peace. I am deep in the recovery world now, and the Serenity Prayer is one we recite often: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Serenity is being in the eye of the storm. Everything may be crazy around you, but you have the ability to remain calm. I do want serenity. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that my personality naturally seeks out peace and calm. That is always going to be something I am searching for. And usually,…
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Posted in: personal, personal, recovery, personal, thoughts

advent plans

November 24, 2017

I am very excited to be heading into my first Advent as a Catholic-in-training. We have celebrated Advent to some extent in years past, a little more each year as I’ve been inching liturgical, but this year I really want to get into it! I thought it would be fun/helpful to write out my plan for celebrating at home. Here is my plan, which I think is totally doable although I’m sure we will end up skipping some! Personal Advent Devotions >Blessed Is She Advent study – I am looking forward to diving into this! It is a great mix of Scripture, reflection, and journaling. I’ll be doing this in the mornings. >Every Sacred Sunday mass journal – This isn’t…
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Posted in: faith, catholic

week in the life 2017 : sunday

November 13, 2017

6:30 AM // Once again I’m up at the same time as Liam. We start by making and eating breakfast together; he has some eggs with me today. 6:55 AM // Settle down to do my Bible reading with Liam. 7:10 AM // Meredith is up with us now. The kids start telling each other silly stories and having Alexa play random songs and dancing. I’m not even annoyed that they are interrupting me because they are so cute. 7:30 AM // I talk to David for awhile – he is not feeling well. The kids watch TV. 7:50 AM // Get dressed for church and get the kids ready. Say bye to David and leave for church. 8:35 AM…
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Posted in: documenting, week in the life

week in the life 2017 : saturday

November 12, 2017

6:10 AM // Wake up at the same time as Liam. It’s hard for me to wake up before the kids on the weekends! I have another headache this morning so I first make and eat breakfast so I can take some medicine. I turn on Wild Kratts for Liam and give him some toast to eat. 6:30 AM // Meredith is up now too, so I get her some cereal. I go to try to get my Bible reading done. 7:00 AM // The kids are in my space and annoying me, so I go to my room but Liam finds me there. I give up on finishing my reading right now. 7:20 AM // Shower and get myself…
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Posted in: documenting, week in the life