In Which I Discuss School and Give You Something Funny To Read

Last night I had a dream in which I was having a conversation, in Spanish no less, with a hybrid of a puppy and a goat. In the same dream I was also applying to graduate school. I personally think that if I am able to have a Spanish conversation with a puppygoat then I should be able to get into grad school.

I am not sure exactly what this dream means, but I tend to lean towards the interpretation that it shows how I am losing my mind due to school. If I ever go a few days without posting, it is a safe bet that I am overwhelmed with schoolwork. I was so happy this morning after the test I took because it was actually easy. But a few minutes later I was reminded that I have a large research paper due in two weeks (on the same day as a test in another class), not to mention the 20-page care plans that we are required to do weekly.

Sigh.

But let’s not be negative! I know no one wants to read about my academic woes (and by the way, I really like the word “woe!”), so let’s end on a more upbeat subject! I am compelled to share this snippet that I read in The New Yorker today, because it made me laugh out loud!

“A Conversation at the Grownup Table, As Imagined by the Kids’ Table”

MOM: Pass the wine, please. I want to become crazy.
DAD: O.K.
GRANDMOTHER: Did you see the politics? It made me angry.
DAD: Me, too. When it was over, I had sex.
UNCLE: I’m having sex right now.
DAD: We all are.
MOM: Let’s talk about which kid I like the best.
DAD: (laughing) You know, but you won’t tell.
MOM: If they ask me again, I might tell.
FRIEND FROM WORK: Hey, guess what! My voice is pretty loud!
DAD: (laughing) There are actual monsters in the world, but when my kids ask I pretend like there aren’t.
MOM: I’m angry! I’m angry all of a sudden!
DAD: I’m angry, too! We’re angry at each other!
MOM: Now everything is fine.
DAD: We just saw the PG-13 movie. It was so good.
MOM: There was a big sex.
FRIEND FROM WORK: I am the loudest! I am the loudest!
(Everybody laughs.)
MOM: I had a lot of wine, and now I’m crazy!
GRANDFATHER: Hey, do you guys know what God looks like?
ALL: Yes.
GRANDFATHER: Don’t tell the kids.