It’s Friday, hallelujah, and I want to take a moment to say how grateful to God I am for the way this week has gone. The biggest thing is that my husband David maybe, possibly, hopefully, is on the right track to maybe, possibly, hopefully getting his pain under control. The haziness of that statement is reflective of how I usually feel regarding this whole ordeal, but my goodness, things are looking up!
Yesterday morning when I got to work I was feeling very emotional/irritated/sad for what seemed to me like no reason at all. But I think the reason was that I had to give first-time chemo to a very anxious 22-year-old boy who looks alarmingly like my little brother. It was a very intense chemo, one where the nurse has to stay with the patient for at least two hours monitoring vital signs every 15 minutes. Almost every patient that gets this medication for the first time has some kind of reaction. Add to this the fact that I had never actually GIVEN this particular chemo before, and I was just plain intimidated. I had visions of horrible things happening with me not knowing how to handle them.
But, thank God, one of my coworkers guided me through the process, and the patient slept through the entire thing without a hint of a reaction. Today I am giving him more chemo, and although it isn’t as intense, it is again going smoothly. This makes me a relieved and grateful girl.
Today I am also thankful for the fact that I have no plans tonight besides relaxing at home. Also, the prospect of a weekend off with lots of fun plans including a movie with a friend, leading worship for the first time in ages at church, and my sister-in-law’s baby shower. These are the things that are making me smile today.
Also, that it’s NOT my brother who has cancer, or my husband, or anyone else in my family. But even if it was, God is still good. He’s still taking care of us, his children, which is good news because we really don’t know how to take care of ourselves.