kapachino

Category: personal

  • my brother got married

    I have two awesome younger brothers, David and Barry. David is only 14 months younger than I am, while Barry and I are separated by 3 1/2 years. They are best friends, and while I don’t see or talk to them as much as I’d like, we still have a great time together and lots of wonderful memories.

    David always said he’d be a lifelong bachelor. He claimed he was too selfish to get married. My husband told him over and over that all he needed was the right girl, and he’d change his mind. He was right. Basically, my brother is a walking cliche.

    He and Maggie got engaged earlier this spring, and their wedding was a couple weekends ago. They wanted something small, laid-back, without all of the traditional rituals. I think they pulled it off wonderfully.

    Now for some pictures! Once again, my aunt took all of these. I was too distracted. Thanks, Marchar!

    This is the little outfit Meredith wore to the rehearsal:

    They had a bunch of props out for the photobooth, and since my brother is a South Carolina grad, this was one of them.

    Later at the rehearsal dinner Maggie’s sister’s daughter Stella (now David’s niece too) was fascinated by Meredith. She’s 2 1/2 years old. She wanted to hold Meredith, so I set them up but kept my hand there for safety. Stella took my hand and pushed it away and said, “Take your hand off.” She wanted to do it all by herself!

    The newly-married couple! Maggie looked amazing.

    My youngest brother Barry gave such an amazing Best Man speech. I wanted him to keep going! It was personal, funny, touching, and emotional. Seriously, some girl needs to snatch him up. When I got married he wrote me a 3-page letter full of memories. He brought Meredith a birthday gift in the hospital and makes special trips to see her. He’s sensitive, hilarious, and extremely smart. Any takers??

    And of course, here’s Meredith in her wedding outfit. Their colors were black and red, so it was perfect.

    Getting tired.

    After a week of being sick and a weekend full of family and festivities, we were relieved to get back to our regular routine last week and enjoy a low-key weekend at home.

  • Workplace Happiness

    Going to work is kind of necessary for most of us. Unless you are independently wealthy, have a sugar daddy, are still in school, or just make a lot of sacrifices and frugal choices to stay at home, you probably work. Usually it’s around 40 hours a week, some more, some less. That’s a huge chunk of time, so it makes sense that how you feel while at work is going to have a big impact on your overall happiness.

    I’d say the best way to stay happy at work is to love what you do. I’m a registered nurse, and I’m really glad I can say that I do love it. I work in outpatient oncology, and the bulk of what I do is administer chemo, blood products, and other IV medications. It’s different every day so I don’t get bored, challenges me mentally, and best of all allows me to meet people and affect them positively in the midst of tough circumstances. I’ve started making it my mission to give them a good experience in our clinic and hopefully begin or continue a positive relationship with them. When my patients are happy, it’s easy for me to be happy too.

    Sometimes, however, I’m running late, I run into a lot of snags with a patient, things get hectic, I forget to drink water or don’t have time to eat lunch, I didn’t get enough sleep, etc. It’s during those times that I have to take extra steps to get through the day happily. They include:

    >Coffee. I drink some every morning on the way to work, but if that’s not enough I’ll turn to the clinic pot for an extra boost.

    >Gum. Sometimes it’s all I need to get a little burst of energy until I have a chance to sit down and eat.

    >Ask for help. I’m not the only nurse there, and we’re a team. Lots of people are glad to help ease my burden.

    >Vent. Whether it’s calling my husband or talking to a coworker, sometimes I just need to get out my frustrations and I feel better.

    >Positive self-talk. I remind myself that I’m only there until 4 p.m., put myself in the place of my patients (immediate perspective), or remember all the great experiences I’ve had at work. I also try and think about something I look forward to, like picking up my daughter from daycare.

    These are just some examples. How do YOU stay happy and engaged at work?

    ***
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  • drive: not really a movie review

    This past weekend my husband and I went on an Actual Date to the movies, just the two of us. When deciding what to see, we went strictly by the description on my Flixster app, since neither of us get out enough to have heard anything about the current movies out. We chose to see Drive, with Ryan Gosling and Carey Mulligan. It seemed like it’d be a fun action flick, had an 8.4 rating on imdb.com, and over 90% on Rotten Tomatoes. Sounds promising, right?

    The reason this isn’t really a movie review is because I don’t deny that it was very well made, and I’m sure many people will love it and even rave about it. (My brother, for instance, told me that he quite enjoyed it.) But it was NOT what we were expecting, and not something I’d ever like to see again. In fact, I wish I could un-see it. It was dark, depressing, eerie, and violent; the kind of violence that is personal and disturbing. There is a scene where one man shakes the hand of another man who had been his friend, and as he does so he slits his arm with a knife severing the artery. “That’s it, it’s over. There’s no pain,” he says to the dying man, as if it’s some kind of consolation. This murder was committed just because the man knew something incriminating.

    At this scene my stomach turned and I actually began to cry. There were several other similar scenes and it really got to me. My husband told me we could leave, but it was almost over so we stuck it out. It’s not that I can’t handle blood – I’m a nurse. And it’s not that I dislike dark or emotional movies. But I’ve always hated gratuitous violence, and now that I’m a mom it almost makes me sick. This movie did not leave us with any positive feelings or hope.

    Last week David and I attended the viewing of an 18-year-old girl, his boss’s granddaughter, who recently passed away from a brain tumor. That’s my baby, her father said to us. That night I dreamed that Meredith died, and I woke up sobbing uncontrollably. Even when I realized it was a dream, I couldn’t stop because I felt so much fear that something bad will happen to her and I don’t feel like I could survive that. I know it’s not possible or even ultimately best for her, but I want her life to be perfect. I’m hypersensitive to anything evil or bad in the world now, and I don’t need a movie to remind me of it.

    We should have just seen Dolphin Tale.

  • Good Things: September

    1 – A visit from the old church youth group

    2 – Best massage of my life

    3 – Long leisurely brunch with Lauren W.

    4 – Going to a wonderful new church (Cornerstone)

    5 – Family outing to Fuddruckers & Marble Slab

    6 – Organized pantry, trip to doctor & shopping

    7 – Free breakfast at Chick-Fil-A

    8 – Floor time with M. while I read to her

    9 – Zelda with Lauren W. & finishing Infinite Jest

    10 – Having my parents over for dinner; my dad watching football w/ David & Mom & me giving M. her bath

    11 – The Weepies with Sara K.

    12 – Visit from Maggie R.

    13 – Lunch with David

    14 – Lots of good time relaxing with M. on the couch

    15 – Couple hours of alone time with David

    16 – Facial, David saying good night to M. and I by drawing on my arm while she nurses down

    17 – Crafting club; Maggie P’s bachelorette party

    18 – Another great experience at church at Cornerstone

    19 – Visit from Lauren W.

    20 – Watching DWTS premiere

    21 – Last day of maternity leave: M. being extra cuddly, David taking her so I can get things done

    22 – First day back at work going smoothly

    23 – Dinner at Scott & Vanessa’s

    24 – Quality time with Meredith, cooking dinner for family, evening walk

    25 – Being invited to small group at new church, exploring Pottermore, dinner at in-law’s house

    26 – Dad visiting M. at daycare & sending me a pic, getting an IV on a patient I’ve always had trouble with

    27 – Getting a new-to-us car, David’s silly videos with M. and his being extra helpful

    28 – When David went the wrong way coming home & acted like he knew where he was

    29 – Meredith smiling when she saw me when I picked her up from daycare

    30 – Seeing the church kids in their high school talent show

  • Notes From A Working Mother

    Well guys, I did it. I made it through a whole week of work! I have so many things to say I don’t even know where to start. I guess with the fact that I am not, as feared, now incompetent at my job. I’m pleased to report that I remember how to do everything, and not only that but I am more awesome at it than before. This is obviously due to the fact that I was grossly pregnant for about a million years and I am no longer thus, meaning I have TONS of energy that I’m not used to having, and also my hands are no longer numb, well, two fingertips are and probably always will be, but that doesn’t even count, and anyway I can start IV’s again!

    So work went really well, except for one day where I left forty minutes late (not acceptable), but I suspect (but don’t want to believe) that I was given an easier-than-normal assignment and that this will not last. Well, whatever, I won’t think about that.

    Yesterday at work everyone was supposed to wear pink for breast cancer awareness month, which is October. My manager even texted us all at 5:30 a.m. to remind us. And that’s fine and good and all, but my pink scrubs don’t currently fit. I tried them on and they were looking more like leggings. It’s pretty embarrassing when you outgrow scrubs, even fitted ones, I mean they have a DRAWSTRING. So I wore a pair of blue scrubs that do fit, and of course EVERYONE was wearing pink including the GUYS. That means that everyone was asking me, “Why didn’t you wear pink?” And I could have just said that I don’t own pink scrubs, except for the fact that I used to wear them all the time. So I had to spend the whole morning telling people about the baby weight I put on and haven’t lost yet. THAT was fun.

    ***

    Enough about work. Let’s talk baby! She spends Monday through Thursday in daycare, and Fridays my mom is off work and keeps her. She did awesome. My dad drives around for work and was able to stop by and visit her every day, sending me a picture each time. Witness:

    Monday: Dad feeds her a bottle (hence the drool)

    Tuesday: The fuzziest hair of all time

    Wednesday: Just chillin’ with Pops

    Thursday: All the single ladies, put your hands up

    And then there was Friday, when I made my mom text more than she ever has in her life to keep me updated. She sent me lots of pictures, but I couldn’t stop looking at this one:

    The cuteness is overwhelming. First of all, her smile. Anytime she smiles I melt, but this is a serious grin. The squinty eyes, the dimple, the double chin, ahhhh. Secondly, the huge Astros onesie. It’s a size 18 months which is all my mom had at her house, because apparently what I sent her in got dirty and Mom didn’t want to try to put her in the backup clothes I sent since they said “up to 11 pounds” and Meredith is over 12 (even though, for the record, they totally fit). Finally, she’s sitting in a Bumbo! We don’t have one, so this was the first time she got to try it out and I’m so proud of her for sitting in it so well.

    But back to daycare. I’m going to be honest and say that it feels very wrong to be dropping her off there all day. The first few times I didn’t know if I’d be able to continue to do it. BUT it has gotten easier. And the more I get to know the people there the more I like them. There are only three other babies there, and the director and assistant director are both very involved so I know she gets a lot of attention. One awesome thing is that they LOVE her cloth diapers! I thought I’d be lucky to find a place that accepted them, but it’s so much better that they are actually happy about it. And Meredith is happy there so far; my dad says that every time he comes by she’s smiling and content. So I know everything will be okay, despite my inability to not cry about it.

    ***

    One day this week I thought, “I should probably check the mail.” When I opened our box all that was inside was a key to the package compartment, and when I opened that it was full of our mail. I was so happy, because this answered a longstanding question I had about what they would do if the mailbox became too full. I was also happy because in the mail had arrived three issues of Martha Stewart Living, one of Elle Decor, and a Rearz fitted diaper that I won in a giveaway. This particular diaper requires a cover, which I do not have. So now of course I must buy one. I’m thinking of getting the Thirsties Duo Wrap, but anyone have any thoughts on the matter?

    ***

    I need to buy a dress for my brother’s wedding which is in TWO WEEKS. This is crazy because I never thought my brother would get married. But anyway, he is, and in two weeks, and I am the only bridesmaid other than the maid of honor, her sister. The bride has graciously allowed us to choose our own black dresses. I am looking for something with an empire waist (see: baby weight), in a silky material, and preferably with sleeves of some sort because her sister’s dress has sleeves and I want to kind of sort of match her.

    Maybe something like this faux wrap dress with cap sleeves:

     Or this, which I really like better, but it’s strapless:

     I don’t know. And now I’m realizing that I’ll need to buy shoes also. Well if I MUST.

    ***

    Oh! I forgot to mention another exciting thing. Up until this week my husband has been driving a truck and therefore we’ve only had one car with a car seat which makes things kind of difficult at times. We didn’t want to get a new car because we want to pay off our debt, but we were able to work out a deal with his dad and we ended up trading him our truck for his car. Now all we have to do is buy a car seat and then I’ll be able to drop Meredith off at daycare, take the bus to work, and then David can pick her up much earlier than I’d be able to. We want to get another convertible car seat, but since we have to buy this one ourselves, probably not another Britax like we have already. What are some good, economical choices?

    ***

    Cooking during the week now? Not going to happen for awhile, until I really get into a groove. I’ll be able to stock up on some weekends, but not this one. I’m too tired, have too many other things to do, and we have other things going on for dinner. I feel a little bit bad about that since it means I’ll have to take frozen meals to work for lunch next week, but I need a break from something. And that’s okay.

    ***

    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have about a million loads of laundry to do.