Posts Tagged ‘Humor

office drama

February 13, 2008

This was the big drama that unfolded in the office last week. So classic. These are actual, real-life e-mails that I will reproduce for you here, although the names have been changed to protect the innocent. ~~~ From: Jennifer K. To: All Subject: SMELL IN LADIES RESTROOM ON FIFTH FLOOR. For the past week, I have noticed a STRONG odor in our ladies room – it reminds me of Lysol disinfectant. It is so strong, that it makes me nauseous while in the restroom. I called the office downstairs (that takes care of our building), and they said that they do not use Lysol, and nothing new or different has been used to clean our restroom. My big question is:…
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Terminology

February 2, 2008

After a rousing discussion on Shaquille O’Neal’s monthly expenses: Dad: I mean, how on earth does he spend $100,000 on vacations every month, when he’s on the road for half that time and the team pays all his bills? Mom: Well he’s paying for all his cronies who follow him around. Dad: No honey, it’s called a “posse.” Cronies are Italians. “Posse” is for the blacks. Mom: But “posse” is for cowboys. Dad: Not anymore.

“church parking only: violaters will be baptized”

September 30, 2007

When I lived with my parents, there was a church that we would frequently drive by which had a sign out front and its contents were constantly changing. My brothers and I loved it because the sayings were always something funny, witty, or weird. The signs were so creative that my brother David and his friend decided to start naming their songs after it. That’s how they ended up with a song called, “Sticks And Stones May Break My Bones But Words Form Sentences.” I was extremely pleased to discover that my new apartment complex (which I have lived in for a few months now) is situated right next to a church with a sign out front which changes weekly….
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