David: I’m going to go to purgatory.
Me: No you’re not!
David: Yes I am, and it’s going to one giant poker game. But really if you win the game you go to hell, and I’ll try really hard to win but then I won’t because I stink, and then I’ll go to heaven!
Me: …
David: What? You don’t believe me? Why not?
Me: Because the Bible doesn’t say anything about that.
David: It doesn’t say anything about purgatory being a giant poker game?
Me: No.
David: Huh. I think we just interpret it differently.
On Saturday David and I went to Austin to see my good friend and former roommate, Carmen, compete in the O. Henry World Championship Pun Competition. It’s always quite an experience, one which I have actually come to enjoy. I love visiting Austin, seeing Carmen and her family, and the pun competition can be pretty dang funny.
Although David wasn’t completely convinced he would like it, I did catch him making a pun at one point. There was some reverb from the microphones, and someone in the crowd sarcastically yelled, “Can we get some more feedback?” Then David whispers under his breath, “Feedbag.” I made him repeat it to me, and he admitted that he was trying to pun off the word “feedback.” Too bad the pun didn’t have to do with anything…but I thought it was really cute.
Anyway, I would like to proudly say that my friend Carmen won first place in the event “Punniest of Show.” This is where the contestants perform a prepared monologue under two minutes long. I’m so proud! For your enjoyment:
I’m at school today for the last session of a review course I’m taking for the NCLEX. The room we’re in has two doors, and after a break I went to enter the second door, but it was locked from the outside. As I was standing there waiting for a friend to open it for me from inside, a girl I don’t know walked up behind me. She paused for a moment and then said to me in her most helpful tone, “Here’s the handle,” and she reached to open the door. She found it locked just as I had, and then understanding swept over her face.
Internet, if I hope to pass the NCLEX, I certainly hope that by this point in my life I know that a) turning a handle is what opens a door, and b) how to recognize a handle when I see one.
The pinning ceremony is a nursing tradition. Nurses wear pins (usually on their name badge at work) to identify what school they graduated from. These pins were presented to us at the ceremony last night and we were able to choose someone to pin us. I chose David, as my husband-to-be.
But before all of that happened, my parents, David, and I all arrived waaaay early because we didn’t know how the traffic would be. So we decided to get some picture-taking out of the way:
And for some reason I find this very amusing: my mom trying to take a picture of David and me without realizing that the camera was set to record. Obviously I don’t have much patience for this, but David just laughs.
Soon enough my brothers arrived. At this point we were also sharing the table with another family, a family much quieter than ours. As we were waiting for our food, we had the following conversation.
***
Dad: So Uncle David is getting another Ridgeback. They got a good deal on it because it doesn’t have the show-quality ridge. They’re naming it Rigby.
Brother David: Like Eleanor Rigby?
Me: Who is Eleanor Rigby?
Dad (shocked): Kat! David Cook just sang it on American Idol!
Me: So she’s a singer?
Dad (even more shocked): Kat! It’s a song by The Beatles!
Brothers (in unison): AHHHH LOOK AT ALL THE LONELY PEOPLE
Me: I have never heard of it. [This is true. I listened to it later.]
Dad: I can’t believe this.
Me: Listen, I am not a Beatles fan. I don’t dislike them, I will listen to them, but there are so many other things that I would rather hear.
***
My future mother-in-law will be devastated when she reads this, but there it is. My confession.
Continuing with the evening, we waited quite a long time for our food. In fact, David and I were finished with the whole pinning ordeal before we even took a bite. Ah, what the heck, here’s a little video of me being pinned.
So by the time we got to eat we were all ravenous. We promptly cleaned our plates, and my brother Barry asked for seconds, which I don’t think was part of the deal. After he got his request, though, we discovered that we could all just go help ourselves to seconds, even though no one else was doing so. One woman that we were sitting with offered Barry her roll, but he politely declined. A minute or two later, this happened.
***
Dad (to stranger woman): My wife would like your roll.
Mom: Chris! (She hides her face in her hands.) I am SO embarrassed. You were not supposed to say that!
Dad: What? You wanted it!
Stranger woman: I did offer.
***
I like how my family is the noisy one that eats all the food along with other people’s. I think we have more fun.
So now I am pinned. Tonight, I graduate!
Courtesy of my brother David:
These baby hedgehogs think this cleaning brush is their mother!! Click here for the full story.