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  • 2014 in review

    2014 in review

    Most of these questions have been swiped from A’Dell’s post, and she got them from someone else, and so on. But I thought it would be a fun tradition to start, so here we go.

    1. What did you do in 2014 that you’d never done before?

    Sewed a quilt. Ran a 10k. Completed whole30.

    2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

    My resolution for 2014 was just to survive, and I did that. This year I would like to reduce our debt and I am taking on the one little word challenge.

    3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

    I did. I gave birth.

    4. Did anyone close to you die?

    Our two dogs, Cleo and Eddie, died within a couple of months of each other. One of my favorite patients also died, and I attended his funeral.

    5. What countries did you visit?

    No countries. No other cities either.

    6. What would you like to have in 2015 that you didn’t have in 2014?

    Less debt. A vacation.

    7. What dates from 2014 will be etched upon your memory, and why?

    January 17 – Liam was born. February 10 – the day I had to have Cleo put to sleep. May 8 – the day I woke up and found Eddie had died.

    8. What was your biggest achievement of this year?

    I am proud of a few things: our transition to a family of four, completing whole30, and sewing my first quilt.

    9. What was your biggest failure?

    Maybe when I failed to realize that 2-month-old Liam was seriously sick and I didn’t call the doctor. He ended up in the hospital for two days with RSV.

    10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

    I had preeclampsia which lingered even after Liam’s birth and I had to be on blood pressure meds for awhile.

    11. What was the best thing you bought?

    New running shoes.

    12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

    Um…Liam? He was a pretty cool little dude.

    13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

    Meredith went through (is going through) her “threenage” years but I wouldn’t say it appalls me because it’s totally normal for her age and personality. Sometimes it does depress me though. (But more often than that, she’s awesome.)

    14. Where did most of your money go?

    Mortgage, daycare, taxes.

    15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

    Having a baby. Transferring to the hospital nearby. Various crafts and memory-keeping projects.

    16. What song will always remind you of 2014?

    I don’t personally listen to much music, but I’ll say “Let It Go” from Frozen. I know it was released in 2013 but this is the first year that Meredith was old enough to care about anything like that and it was the first “real” song (that wasn’t a nursery rhyme-type thing) that she learned the words to.

    17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

    My happiness is probably about the same. I am considerably thinner, since at this time last year I was 9 months pregnant. I am also considerably poorer. What did we do with our money when we only had one child in daycare??

    18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

    Reading. Date nights. Praying.

    19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

    Worrying about money. Losing my cool with Meredith.

    20. How did you spend Christmas?

    Most of the day was spent at home; my family came to me. None of them have kids so they didn’t arrive until after 10 (we had been awake for 5 hours already, but thankfully my kids don’t realize yet that you can open gifts right away). We watched Frozen because my brother and dad hadn’t seen it yet, ate, and opened gifts. The kids had naps, then in the evening we went to my brother-in-law’s house to celebrate with David’s family. It was significantly noisier there with six kids 5 and under.

    21. What was your favorite TV program?

    I binge-watched (and loved) Sherlock and Downton Abbey on maternity leave. Started Parenthood. I slowly finished watching Gossip Girl on Netflix while running on the treadmill. That’s all I watched this year.

    22. What was the best book you read?

    Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry.

    23. What was your greatest food discovery?

    Dark chocolate covered almonds, how to cook fresh vegetables, the salad I now take every day to work, and that eggs for breakfast are totally doable.

    24. What did you want and get?

    A healthy baby who is a decent sleeper. A Madewell Transport Tote. Our Advent calendar.

    25. What did you want and not get?

    A camera. A calm 3-year-old. More time to myself.

    26. What was your favorite film of 2014?

    I literally only watched two movies this year (other than the first 30 minutes of The Little Mermaid, Frozen, and Toy Story about 100 times at home): Divergent and Guardians of the Galaxy. The latter was my favorite.

    27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

    I turned 32 last February. I was on maternity leave, and I was emotional. I cuddled baby Liam and hung out at home and tried to work on crafts.

    28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

    Regular pedicures. Less sicknesses for all of us (except me, thank GOD I have remained healthy). If I could have figured out how to get the kids to sleep in their own beds.

    29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept of 2011?

    Neutral, minimal, cool, and comfortable. I put together a pretty good summer capsule wardrobe and intend to build on that in the future as funds become available.

    30. What kept you sane?

    Coffee and morning Bible study and my family living nearby (with free babysitting) and routines and occasional double naps.

    31. What political issue stirred you the most?

    I don’t follow politics.

    32. Who did you miss?

    A few of my long-distance best friends. My uncle, who passed away almost two years ago now.

    33. Who was the best new person you met?

    I met a mom in my neighborhood named Melissa and now we are friends and have playdates. It’s pretty great. I also met my current coworkers when I started my new job and they are awesome.

    34. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2014.

    I think the biggest thing I’ve been learning this year is how to prioritize and let things go and to trust that there are seasons of life and not everything has to get done right now. I also got really, really good at time management and automating routines.

    35. Show us one of your favorite photos from the year. 

    family of four

    First photo as a family of four, which is what this year has been all about.

  • personal planning for 2015

    planning for 2015

    As we come to the end of 2014, I want to talk about my goals and intentions for the new year. This kind of fresh start is all mental, of course, but it really works for me.

    After having a baby at the beginning of 2014, the rest of the year was focused on finding my footing as a mom of two, making adjustments, and getting healthy again. I did whole30, started running again, and made daily Bible study a priority. I will constantly be working on my spiritual and physical health, as well as the work/family/personal juggle, but I do feel like I have a basic framework in place. In fact, let me go over that:

    Spiritual:

    >Wake up early every single day (4:30 or 5 a.m. for Bible study, prayer, and personal journaling). This doesn’t always happen if a child is up too early,

    >Involvement at church.

    >To work on: prayer life, giving, volunteering

    Health:

    >Eating – paleo is ideal, but “real food” with the least amount of processed ingredients is what I’ve been aiming for.

    >Exercising – after my half marathons are complete, I want to continue running shorter races and do other exercise 2x per week.

    >To work on: clean up eating (I’ve been indulging in too many Christmas treats, so I’m going to do a week’s reset), take my vitamins, use essential oils, finalize new exercise plan

    Time balance:

    >When I’m at work I’m all there, but leave early whenever possible.

    >Right after work 3x/week I can exercise – run or go to the gym.

    >Weeknights – all family time. Cook dinner, eat together (most nights), play. Go to bed early. Don’t plan anything except dinner with grandparents or occasional church activity.

    >Weekends – lots of family time too, chores done with kids around, David does grocery shopping. Schedule kid-free time for: long runs (until races complete), date nights (once a month – grandparents babysit), alone time for personal projects (memory keeping, blogging, reading, crafts). I need this every week if possible for at least a couple of hours. Eventually I would also like to be able to stay up an hour or two after the kids go to sleep. :)

    >To work on: when I build up PTO, schedule one personal day off per month. Figure out a better way to fit blogging and reading in.

    For 2015, I want to improve on some nonessential, personal areas. These are all important to me, but they take a back seat to the previous areas. Here are the areas I’m thinking about:

    >Nagging tasks

    >Purchases (mostly small) that would increase my happiness or quality of life

    >Style & beauty

    >Memory keeping

    >Blogging

    I’m taking a three-fold approach to goals for 2015: one overarching, big intention unrelated to other things (which for me is going to be financial and I probably won’t be blogging much about it), participating in Ali Edwards’ One Little Word class (and this will have challenges along with it – more on my word soon), and going back to monthly goals. The monthly goals are going to be where I address the nonessential areas above, or at least that’s the plan. Hopefully they will also relate to my word.

    I’ll be sharing more about all of the above in the coming weeks and months. In the meantime look for updates of the regular kind around here. On Wednesday the kids and I are heading up to visit some good friends for a couple of days for their annual NYE party. Sadly, David has to work so we have to go alone and I’m a little nervous…but I will not be deterred, even by a 5-hour road trip with two kids!

    Thanks for sticking with me all this time, and especially now as I figure out my new “blogging normal.” I have lots of ideas for the future, but only time will tell if I can make them happen. :)

  • fall goals update and life lately

    kapachino: life lately

    kapachino: life lately

    Seasonal goals has been perfect for me this year as I adjusted to having two children. I’m going to revamp my system for next year, though, so I won’t be making winter goals. More on my planning for 2015 soon.

    >Run a 10k: I did this back in September. Although my running hasn’t progressed the way I wish it had, a 10k isn’t a big deal for me anymore and for that I am proud.

    >Finish quilt: done! I have another one planned, but no idea when I’ll actually start it.

    >Take the Grocery Savings Made Simple e-course: I did this, and it was really helpful and inspiring. There are still some tasks I need to complete. some systems I want to implement, and some things I want to try making from scratch, but at least I know what to do now.

    >Christmas gifts done by the beginning of December: I got a lot of them, but not all. I still have a few left. Overall the holiday stress itself hasn’t been bad this year, it’s just other stuff that’s stressing me out.

    >Read a parenting book: I read Raising Your Spirited Child and it was awesome. I had planned to write a whole series of blog posts based on what I learned, but that hasn’t happened yet. I do have extensive notes, but for now I’ll just recommend it highly if you have a child that is more intense than others.

    Life lately:

    kapachino: life lately

    16073414525_bd033252ee_z

    Last week Meredith got sick a day after Liam, so I missed 2 1/2 days of work total. Thankfully they both rebounded in a day and currently everyone is healthy. (THIS IS A HUGE DEAL. I SHOULD BE MORE EXCITED ABOUT IT INSTEAD OF JUST BEING PARANOID.)

    kapachino: life lately

    I dropped off homemade hot cocoa mix for the daycare teachers (all ten of them) and learned my lesson about sticking to gift cards in the future.

    Over the weekend I got the rest of the Christmas shopping done. We have kept it as minimal as possible, but it’s still hard to keep track of everything. Unfortunately, I haven’t managed to wrap anything yet.

    kapachino: life lately

    I can run a 30-minute 5k pretty easily now, even if I’m having an off day. My running buddy and I are making a point to do the long runs together and are increasing them by a mile each week, and it really helps. We had different schedules this past weekend so I did 8 miles by myself and finished up the Serial podcast. I felt good, but very achy in the joints. If you’re a long-distance runner, I’d appreciate any advice on how to prepare for long runs.

    David’s truck overheated twice, and we had to have it repaired twice.

    I finished the book Major Pettigrew’s Last Stand, loved it, and am reading Crow Lake this week for book club. I’m also almost done with Yes, Please on audio.

    kapachino: life lately

    Lately I’ve been too tired, and I’ve been overreacting and losing patience and just being a grump with my family, especially with David, who is only trying to help me and be sweet to me. I have a feeling it has to do with a) lack of good sleep and b) my diet, which needs to be cleaned up again. Because really, there’s no need for this. I’m in the middle of choosing my One Little Word for 2015 and I’m taking into consideration how I don’t want to feel as well as what I do want.

    kapachino: life lately

    kapachino: life lately

    kapachino: life lately

    Shopping with my dad this weekend buoyed my spirits, as did attending a Christmas show at their church. I love seeing the cards come in the mail (ours will be going out this week) and the holiday decorations everywhere.

    I heard that Christmas (the feast of the Incarnation) was established on December 25 because it’s one of the shortest days of the year, in order to give us hope at a dark time. I’m so grateful for that, because my mood is definitely affected by the winter season, yet Christmas remains my favorite holiday. It’s so wondrous, and I don’t know about you but I need that hope more than ever.

  • liam at eleven months

    Liam 11 months 4

    He:

    >Got sick. Again. (He totally had a fever when I took these photos.) This time it was the flu, even though he did have the flu shot – but he got on Tamiflu and was better in a day. I was shocked that his ears, nose, and throat were all pristine. I started up his breathing treatments again and praying that we can keep things under control.

    >Learned to play Peekaboo and I forgot how awesome that is. The funniest part is that he doesn’t realize he’s supposed to cover up his eyes so he will just lift his arms up over his head and bring them down again. He thinks it’s the best thing in the world.

    >Wants to feed himself all the time and will hardly accept baby food from me at all. I usually give him scrambled eggs, taco meat, shredded chicken, fruit, or puffs.

    >Crawls all over the place and is into everything. The house does not stay clean or organized ever, and forget trying to get anything done with him at home, unless I’m willing to accept a complete disaster.

    >Got moved to the toddler room at daycare even though he doesn’t yet toddle. But he’s so much bigger and more mobile than the other babies so I know he is happier there. I’m still in denial though.

    >Loooves taking baths and probably wishes we gave him more. :)

    >Kicks his feet whenever he’s excited or upset. It can be really cute or really annoying. When he’s sitting down he’ll kick his feet so much he’ll spin in a circle.

    >Is a total mama’s boy. Anytime he sees me he drops whatever he’s doing immediately and comes straight for me.

    Liam 11 months 3

    Liam 11 months

    I:

    >Am soooo tired of him being sick.

    >Can’t believe it’s the week before Christmas. I’m slowly but surely making progress on my holiday to-do list. Next in the queue of tasks to be completed: putting together gifts for daycare teachers, finishing up a few gifts for family & coworkers, wrapping the rest, going shopping with my Dad for stocking stuffers, and delegating Christmas Day meal responsibilities. My cards just came in the mail and I was happy to see that past me wisely made them say “Happy New Year” with no mention of Christmas, so I have an extra week to get those out. I hope we can go see some lights at some point, but it’s ok if that doesn’t happen this year.

    >Have been taking photos and notes to put together a December Daily album. It will happen, but I’m not sure when. The Collect app has been awesome for keeping track of a project like this.

    >Plan on signing up for the One Little Word workshop for the first time. I have an idea for my word, but I’m not 100% sure of it yet.

    >Manage to run 2-3 times per week, and am increasing my long runs by a mile per week. I take them pretty slow and so far haven’t been struggling although I do have hip pain. I think I will be okay during the half marathons, but after I run them I’m going to stick to 5k’s and 10k’s for awhile. I’m getting excited for the race though.

    >Still have a ton of ideas for this here blog, but it’s also been a relief to just jot them down for the future.

    >Want to have a solid plan of action for organizing my life and setting goals in the new year. Things have been chaotic lately, and I’m ready for that to end.

    >Have been easing myself up to Liam’s first birthday by thinking of him as being one already. I tell myself he’s one, although I know he really isn’t yet, but then when he actually turns one it won’t be such a shock. Anyway, he’s going to be “baby brudder” for a long time, I think. :)

    Liam 11 months 2

    For reference:

    0 months
    1 month
    2 months
    3 months
    4 months
    5 months
    6 months
    7 months
    8 months
    9 months
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    Meredith at 11 months

  • working mama files : erin from mischief managed

    Working Mama Files is an interview series designed to support and encourage working moms along the path to having a fulfilling life.

    Today I’m excited to share with you Erin from the blog Mischief Managed. She has such an interesting story of motherhood involving infertility, twins, pumping, childcare, and she is also super passionate about her job. I encourage you to read the whole interview and get to know her because I know she will be helpful to you in some way!

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    Who lives in your house?

    My husband, Ted, my almost 4-year-old twin daughters, Charlotte and Evelyn, and our dogs, Rufus and Kaya. And me. I live there too.

    Will you tell us a little about your current job and how you ended up there?

    For eight years, I worked as an early childhood special educator teacher. I taught 3-5 year olds with some pretty intense needs. Last year, I made a big change. I stepped out of the classroom and into the role of instructional coach. I feel a little like I stumbled into this role, but I’m so glad I’m here. I interviewed for the position originally because part of the work was supporting teachers with technology integration, which I am hugely passionate about. I quickly learned how much I love working with adult learners and being a part of systems change. I work with a team of coaches to support 11 schools in our district that are considered failing as a part of No Child Left Behind. It’s tough, exciting, fascinating, and powerful work. I’m kind of a geek about teaching and learning, so I love it.

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    You were open about your journey of infertility and how you became pregnant with your girls via IUI (just like me with Meredith!). What was it like undergoing treatments while working?

    Oof. It was tough. Going through treatment is so emotional to begin with, and then you are pumped full of hormones. Oh. And there were 3 pregnant women in my building at the time, so everything was all about babies. Plus there were the fun comments like, “Don’t drink the water or you’ll be next!” Or the helpful advice like, “Eat a cookie.” No, seriously. My boss told me that would help.

    Still, work was also a welcome distraction. My students helped keep my mind off of things and gave me a sense of purpose. My best friend worked in the same building with me, so I always had a shoulder to cry on. I was also very lucky because, at the time, students didn’t arrive until 9:30, so I had plenty of time to go to my early appointments for blood work and ultrasounds.

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    You ended up having twins! Usually the thought of twins gives me anxiety, but seeing your updates makes it look so fun. :) What would you say are the unique issues surrounding twins and working?

    Having twins is the best! Nothing thrills me more than hearing that someone is having twins. Not that it isn’t hard, but it’s so magical.

    Aside from the obvious child care issues, I think that the most unique issue as a working twin mama is not having a support system of other working twin mamas. I thought about this question for a long time, and it made me realize that most of the moms of twins I know don’t work. Most people who meet me outside of work assume I don’t, and most people who know me at work are shocked to learn that I work full-time and have twins. I would love to know more twin mamas who work. If that’s you…call me!

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    One thing I am super impressed by is how you pumped exclusively for your girls when they were babies. What led to that decision, and what were your feelings about it?

    When I found out I was having twins and began thinking about how I would feed them, I knew I wanted to breastfeed. I also knew that this could be a challenge, and so I made my goal to feed my babies in whatever way best met our needs. I wanted to breastfeed, but I also wanted to be realistic with myself in regards to issues surrounding prematurity, nursing two babies, and working. I never imagined I would have ended up exclusively pumping for over 6 months.

    So, how did I get there? The girls were born 5 weeks early and quickly proved to be slow, lazy eaters. They had to learn to master the art of sucking, swallowing, and breathing. It’s a tough skill for teeny babies. They were largely tube fed early on, so I started pumping right away to get them breast milk. After two weeks in the NICU, they were eating decent enough on their own to go home, but from a bottle. They really struggled at the breast, but we left the NICU with plans to work on it. Unfortunately, it’s virtually impossible to work on anything when you have two infants at home. Our lives quickly became a dance of pumping, feeding one baby, feeding the other baby, and starting all over again. Working on nursing one screaming baby while the other baby screamed? It just wasn’t happening. So, I continued pumping.

    Around that time, I developed an awful thrush infection. It lasted for nearly 8 weeks. I won’t tell you all of the gross details, but my nipples were a scary sight. Again, working on nursing with nipples that couldn’t even touch fabric without reducing me to tears just wasn’t happening. I was willing to grimace through pumping, but I wanted to enjoy feeding my babies. And before long, it was time for me to go back to work. Pumping had just sort of become what we did. It wasn’t a choice so much as the result of our circumstances.

    I have FEELINGS about pumping. Proud that I did it, sad that I never nursed my girls, frustrated that my body failed me again, angry that pumped milk is referred to as second-best milk. It was hard. I’m glad I did it, but it was so, so hard.

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    Pumping is a reality for many working moms, so what advice or encouragement do you have for them?

    Take care of yourself. Sleep, drink water, eat. You are working full time and being a mama full time, and that’s a lot already, but if you neglect yourself, pumping is going to be that much harder. Also, know your rights as a pumping mom. If you don’t have a clean, private space to pump that isn’t a bathroom, speak up.

    You are incredibly passionate about your job, which is so awesome. But how do you keep your work/life balance when work can take up so much time (isn’t that the eternal question)?

    This really is the eternal question! For me, balance is all about prioritizing. I have a lot of lists…lists for work, lists for home, lists for my graduate classes, lists for everything. It’s a daily dance of looking at what is most critical to complete and making choices about what I can let go of. Sometimes, I really rock it. Other times, it’s so overwhelming.

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    You guys manage to only need ten hours of childcare per week despite you both working full time! Will you tell us some more about that?

    Crazy, huh? As a teacher, I work pretty traditional hours, but my husband works for Trader Joe’s, so his schedule is much less traditional. He is also able to work four 10-hour days which gives him three days off during the week. So, he’s home with the girls three full weekdays. The other two week days, he closes, so he’s home with them in the mornings and the sitter comes in the afternoons until I get home. We are really lucky that childcare currently costs us $120. We are also so lucky that we can both work full time and have our daughters be cared for by a parent most of the time. There are sacrifices, of course. I solo evenings and bedtime 3 nights a week, and my weekends are basically all solo parenting. Ted solos wake-up and getting the girls to school. We don’t have as much time as a family as we would like, but we make it work.

    What has been your biggest struggle, doubt, or resistance so far being a working mom?

    Definitely the mom guilt thing. I always feel guilty when I have to let something go. For instance, I waited until the last minute to book the park by our house for the girls’ birthday, so it wasn’t available. It was the beginning of the school year which is just a crazy time, so it slipped my mind. I felt like I’d let the girls down, when in reality it was really no big deal. I think sometimes it’s not so much my own guilt as that little voice from society that says I’d be a “better” mom if I stayed home.

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    In your experience, what is the best part of being a working mom?

    For me, the best part of being a working mom is continuing to pursue my passion and modeling that for my daughters. I want them to grow up knowing they can do anything if they work hard enough. I want them to see that their mama is doing her best to help others on a daily basis.

    Do you have any tips or tricks to pass along that help you lead a more joyful, fulfilling life?

    Do something for yourself every day. As moms, we almost always put everyone else’s needs before our own. I think self-care is so vital, so care for yourself daily. For me, reading is my self-care. I also love to paint my nails, be crafty, and nap.

    working mama files : erin from mischief managed on kapachino

    Now a few questions for fun…

    How do you like your coffee? Or are you a tea drinker?

    After having been a tea drinker for my entire life, I’ve recently become a complete coffee addict. I still love my tea, but my morning cup of coffee really helps me get going in the morning. I like my coffee with cream and a little hazelnut syrup. Yum!

    What was the last good book you read?

    I just finished The Art of Fielding by Chad Harbach, and I loved it. I am a huge reader, so if you want to see more of what I’m reading, come find me on Goodreads!

    What’s on your nightstand?

    Allergy meds, vitamins, water, nail polish, nail files, the girls’ monitor, and a teddy bear made out of my dad’s old shirt. Next to my bed is my giant pile of books.

    Favorite social media site?

    It’s a toss up between Twitter and Instagram. Twitter has been my lifeline on many occasions, so it has a special place in my heart. Seriously…how did moms do the mom thing before twitter? I adore Instagram because I love pictures. I love the little snapshots into the lives of my friends.

    Can you recommend one blog you read?

    We Still Read! It’s my favorite place for book recommendations and to connect with other mamas who love to read. (Confession: I wrote this recommendation before they asked me to be a contributor!)

    ***

    Isn’t Erin so inspiring? Connect with her on her blog, Twitter, Instagram, and Goodreads!

    See all the posts in this series here